Strawberries, object of all desires
Mar. 8th, 2010 04:11 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Title: Strawberries, object of all desires
Pairing: Ianto/Jack, squirrel in love/ stone garden squirrel
Rating: nc-17
Word count: 1964
Spoilers: not really... early season 2
Disclaimer: I don't own Torchwood or any of the characters
Warning: explicit sex
Genre: Humor, action, crack-fic
Summary: What happens when a man and a squirrel in love want have the same purpose....
Beta: The fabulous
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
Notes: This is for the so charming
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
Strawberries, object of all desires
(Humm…*sound of chewing* Hoo yes, you’re so right, this cake is really better with strawberries. Yep, humm… C’n hab mor *translation because mouth full: Can I have more?* Whab? *what?* Whab about fib? *what about fic* frakkin ? Squirreb *squirrel* Hooo!!! *swallows hardly* Squirrel fic? What? She wants more about this squirrel in love? *hooo it is the one that is in love with a garden stone squirrel in the fic nominated for children award and it’s called Never trust a squirrel in love? * Hooo but don’t you see I am busy right now??? What about readers? The perverted ones? Hooo, hello, you are here! You want a fic? Humm, what a great coincidence, I have one just for you… This is my dear perverted reader, what happens when a squirrel and a man in love have the same purpose: having strawberries… On with the show: curtains rise up!)
At this precise moment, pressed against Jack’s desk, Ianto Jones has two thoughts in mind: One - Jack’s lips on his cock is the most amazing sensation in the world and two - he really wants to eat strawberries. He closes his eyes and tries to slow his breathing down; he doesn’t want the others in Hub hear him. Feeling his hard cock inside his lover’s mouth sends him almost to the edge of insanity: he wants to scream and fuck his lover’s gorgeous mouth. But, Ianto Jones is a serious man, he knows how to keep his dignity. So he restrains himself and enjoys the moment.
At this precise moment, kneeling in front of his lover, Jack Harkness has two thoughts in mind: One - He’ll have never enough of the taste of his lover’s cock and two - he would do whatever to satisfy his lover’s desires. At the sight of Ianto’s debauched state, he feels fire inside him; he knows the young man is trying to restrain his moans. Jack grins, deep throats his lover’s cock and grasps Ianto’s buttocks firmly. (this is a free interlude just for you perverted readers, yes I know, I know, I am so good for you) With his strong hands Jack grasps with ardor Ianto’s perfect buttocks. His fingers caress firmly, his nails digging in just enough to scratch Ianto’s soft skin. At the sound of excited moans exited Ianto’s lips, desire explodes inside him. His tongue devours Ianto’s cock more greedily, his hands rhythmically squeeze his lover’s buttocks in a frenetic dance; the sound of Ianto’s skin rubbing against his own makes him hard. In this precise moment, Jack Harkness is a man in love and perfectly happy.
At this precise moment, hugged against its cold lover, a squirrel has two thoughts in mind: one - it knows what happiness is and two - it should offer its lover a present. The ball of fur stares at it’s quiet lover and sighs: it’ll protect it until the end of the world. With its little paws it caresses it’s delicate lover’s face softly; the ball of fur shivers, it;s never seen pure beauty in one creature like this before. The squirrel closes it eyes, it doesn’t want to scare it, but it wants so much to kiss it. So, with all its courage, it leans forward puckering its gorgeous lips and kisses it nervously. During a moment nothing happens, then, with feverish embrace, the ball of fur kisses its lover more firmly and they both fall to the ground. Giggles blow up inside him and dance on his lips: at this exact moment the squirrel knows he would die for love.
Ianto Jones can’t restrain his body anymore, the warm mouth and the expert lover’s tongue brings him into another world, his vision blurs, his pelvis moves up and down like waves crashing against the rocks. He’ll come soon, he’s lost control of himself. But why the hell does he have the image of strawberries in mind and the word on his lips?
Jack Harkness senses his lover shaking and takes like glory his semen on his tongue, drinks it suavely. He enjoys the moment so much when Ianto comes screaming his name like an offering on his lips. But, this time something’s wrong, its not his name his lover screams, but strawberries. What? *sound of disc failure* Jack Harkness hesitates between indignation and giggles; really strawberries? (If you want to know my opinion, I think strawberries are a sweet fruit and could have been screamed in a brilliant way when the orgasm takes you like a furious storm... What? You don’t care about my thoughts, you just want to read more about Ianto’s orgasm? YOU ARE SO RUDE!!! And who is the storyteller here? No, no, I don’t want your excuse, its too late...*puts fingers in ears so I can’t hear you*)
Ianto Jones looks down with confusion to his lover. He really screamed strawberries?
“I really screamed strawberries?”
“You really screamed strawberries?”
“Strawberries!!” Yells the ball of blur with excitation, he knows now that it’s the perfect present for it lover. (Of course, you know squirrels don’t talk, right? So, in fact it just squeaks, not real words. But you knew that, right? Right? *stares at readers with a suspicious look*).
Jack Harkness’s joyful laugh blows up in the air like thousands of sparkles in a fire. The young man in front of him blushes, trying with clumsy movements to pull up his trousers.
“It’s…I… sorry…Sometimes I… just stupid…” Ianto stammers shyly.
“Ha! Ha! It’s my new nickname or your new kink?” The older man asks pushing his body and his hard groin against his lover’s body.
“No! No… It’s… Jack!”
At the view of his embarrassed young lover the man can’t resist to kiss his gorgeous lips passionately.
“So tell me? Why strawberries?”
“It’s… The things you do to me… Jack, it’s like dying and being reborn at the same time, it’s so powerful… And then, I thought that it was delicious like eating strawberries…I love strawberries...”
Jack grins and squeezes Ianto’s buttock firmly (firm and rounded, exposed like an offering in his trousers… Hooo yes baby…Oops! Sorry readers…) and murmurs like a caress in his ear: “I’ll bring you all the strawberries you want Ianto Jones and make you scream with pleasure like an insane…”
At the same moment, a ball of fur makes the decision that it will bring back strawberries for its lover. With a tender smile, he delicately places his lover comfortably down onto the ground (it doesn’t understand why its lover has some difficulty staying balanced, but he loves it anyway. *whispered voice* In fact, the poor thing doesn’t know its lover is a stone garden squirrel. DON’T TELL IT!). Then, the squirrel sticks out its chest, stretches its legs and exits in a powerful jump outside: all the nature around him hold its breath, the ball of fur is the perfect image of determination and courage; a model for a generation of squirrels, a living icon (here the Queen’s song We are the champions echoes on the air! What? Even a squirrel can have a soundtrack!).
Three hours later
Captain Jack Harkness is a happy man. In a bag, he brings proudly a punnet of strawberries. It was not easy to find this time of the year. After multiple frustrations, he finally found the object of all his lover’s desire in a little market hidden in a dark alley. But he got it, he brings back to his lover the delicious red and sweet fruit; to hear Ianto yell in the sexiest way the fruit’s name again, Jack Harkness would have done really stupid things. (But who can blame him? To hear sexy Ianto whispering in an excited way fruit names or anything for that matter, I would do really stupid things myself… Hooo yay, hum… Sexy Ianto voice…*happy sighs* WHAT? What about the story? Haaaa you’re so annoying with your story!!) He is almost back to the Hub, grin dancing on his lips, he walks with conviction toward his lover. Then, in the middle of the road, in the park beside the Hub, stands a cute little squirrel. (RUN JACK!!! RUN!!!!! Oups, sorry readers, I was too much involved in the story…) The ball of fur stares at the man directly in his eyes, it knows only one of them will stand at the end; It is ready to fight, it’ll have the strawberries. At first, the man doesn’t feel danger, he walks beside it without suspicion. Then, the ball of fur bounds furiously around him and spits angrily. Captain Jack Harkness is not a man who is afraid of a little squirrel, but deep down he has to admit that this one makes him uncomfortable. It’s when the squirrel attacks his bag in a furious frenzy that he understand its purpose.
“Hey! It’s mine!”
But the ball of fur is a squirrel in love; it will do everything for its lover. It scratches and bites furiously at Jack’s hands. In a painful scream, the man tries to push the little creature away, but all his moves are weak: the ball of fur will fight until the end. (See? Never trust a squirrel in love… In fact, never trust a squirrel, they are ALL suspicious…)
“But leave me alone!” The man screams in anger.
With one glorious jump, the squirrel tears open the bag and like fireworks the strawberries blow up in the air. In the same voice, the man and the ball of fur yell. The little creature takes nervously as many strawberries as he can in its little paws, happiness and excitation making it glow with joy. On the other side, the man feels like he’s broken inside, all his efforts reduced to nothing. He wanted so much to please his lover, to be the one who put a brilliant smile on his face. Now, all he can do is stare with sadness at the field of his defeat. The sweet fruits are now down on the ground, most of them mashed. On this sunny afternoon, in the middle of the park, a man faces his own fall: at his feet, the strawberries of his lover’s desire are now nothing more then compote. He sighs profoundly, all he wanted was to surprise his lover.
“Jack?”
A hand on his shoulder, the voice like a soft caress to his ears: all his sadness flies away Ianto…
“Jack? Are you alright?”
“I am sorry Ianto… I wanted to bring you strawberries… But a squirrel attacked me…”
The young man looks at his lover, he knows he could drown inside his deep blue eyes. He kisses Jack’s eyelid softly and then murmurs:
“Ho Captain my Captain, you are my own strawberries… Always will be…”
The older man takes his young lover in his strong arms holding him tightly; he knows what love is. (Ok, let the romantic music swell!)
On the other side of the park
The ball of fur runs as fast as it can: its little heart beats so fast that it is afraid it will beat right out of its chest. He’s done it, he has the delicious fruit. It is so proud of itself! (Of course it is proud! He fought the great Captain Jack Harkness and won!!). Then, now beside its lover, he tries to slow his breathing down ; its lover lays down, like goodness in its pure beauty. He bounds softly toward it and offers it the strawberries. There is no reaction from its lover, but the ball of desire doesn’t care, it knows what love is. (TAAAAAAADAM!!!!!!! Now, lets hear more of the powerful and romantic music! Ok, it’s done, go away readers, the squirrels need some privacy now. GO.AWAY.NOW! Perverts….)
The end
no subject
Date: 2010-03-08 10:32 pm (UTC)And Ianto shouting 'strawberries' when he comes! LOL Glad Jack could see it as funny. hehe.
This was fun and your squirrel in love was as wonderful as always. Thanks so much for writing this with your wonderful sense of humour!!! :D
*hugs you tight*
no subject
Date: 2010-03-08 10:36 pm (UTC)Ha! Ha!!! Poor Ianto, soooo sexy Ianto...:)
You so make my day !!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
no subject
Date: 2010-03-08 10:56 pm (UTC)*gives you lots of free hugs*
no subject
Date: 2010-03-08 11:57 pm (UTC)Sorry for the cough, but so happy I made you laugh!!!!!!!!!!!
Thank you soooooooo much ma chère amie
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 12:04 am (UTC)btw - Stone garden squirrel is currently sitting on an inside windowsill taunting the neighborhood cats, how will be ever get his strawberries now?
no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 12:10 am (UTC)Thanks!!! *HUGS*
You are right, I am not good for the squirrels, they have their own language, its just I cant understand anything. WAIT!!!! Hooo, maybe, its a new spy language... Did you hear about the next convention? Maybe they spy us... * suspicious look around*
btw- Poor little stone garden squirrel, I send Bobo with a basket for it!!!!
btw 2 : I'll maybe go in a bike trip in july in Washington state...
no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 01:20 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 01:30 am (UTC)xxxxx
no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 04:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 12:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 07:00 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 12:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 08:58 am (UTC)I laughed so hard.
*TackleGlompHug*
no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 12:16 pm (UTC)*morning hug*
ps
Sooooooooooooo cute icon!!!!
no subject
Date: 2010-03-10 04:52 am (UTC)xD We were both laughing so hard.
And thank you! I did not make it xD
no subject
Date: 2010-03-10 12:19 pm (UTC)Have a nice day !!!
no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 10:22 am (UTC)*giggles*
That must be the greatest orgasm-line ever! Oh dear, I love this squirrel so much and Jack and Ianto were very cute too. I have a huge smile on my face just because of you, Sweetie *huggles*
Thank you so much for sharing this fic! :D
no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 12:18 pm (UTC)Thanks!!! Hooo yes, imagine Ianto has an orgasm with this line... Hummmm.... yummy... :)
Its so fun to write, thanks to frakkin to ask!!! This little squirrel is soooooooooooo cute in its dertemination and love !!! Yay!!!!! I am so happy I made you smile ma chérie !!!!
Thank you for read and comment!!!!
xxxxx
no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 12:55 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 01:16 pm (UTC)Ha! Ha!! Yep, never mess with a squirrel in love, that is a good advice ;p
Thanks so much my friend and have a good day !!!
no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 08:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 10:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 11:49 pm (UTC)I'm so happy to see another episode of Super Skwerl's sago of unrequited love with the lovely Ice Princess. Some day he will find out to break the evil spell, and she will finally be able to return his love. Well, that's my take on them, at least! :)
I love the little tidbits when you speak to the reader, it's like sitting around with you and listening to you tell it in person--so much more fun and personal.
Even though Super Skwerl won the "Battle of the Hub" againt the great Captian Jack; Jack can stop again at the store and surprise Ianto with stawberries at his flat.
Then there'd be a fade out to "Strawberry Fields Forever" playing softly in the background! :)
no subject
Date: 2010-03-09 11:56 pm (UTC)Its always a great pleasure to read you!! Haaaaa what a good comment to read that its like to be with me :) Thanks so much to comment and read !!! Haa! Ha!!! I love the idea of the evil spell! Poor thing, it is so in love... I should write it a moment of happiness like this...
Have a nice evening ma chérie !!!
xxxx
p.s
Haaaaaaaaaa love your icon!!!!
no subject
Date: 2010-03-10 08:03 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-03-10 10:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-03-10 10:26 pm (UTC)Thank you sweetie, you made me laugh. :)
Your squirrel stories are so funny. I LOVE THEM!! xD
xxxxx
no subject
Date: 2010-03-10 10:45 pm (UTC)I didn't wanted to tell you : HEY YOU!! YES YOU!!! READ MY STORY!!!
But I thought its could be fun to read for you... :)
How you feel today ???
xxxxx
Prends soin de toi
xxxxx
no subject
Date: 2010-03-10 11:00 pm (UTC)Still in a lot of pain, but a bit less than yesterday. It's worse after I put the drops in my ear...and when the tylenols wear off. ;)
I put on some comfortable pyjamas, and I'm preparing to leave tonight so I can go to my class tomorrow.
xxxxxxx
Prends soin de toi aussi
no subject
Date: 2010-03-10 11:34 pm (UTC)Poor you, one day its gonna be over ....
Yark, you take the bus tonight??? Good luck, bring a good book or a movie on your laptop!!!
xxxxxx
Je suis en pyj sur mon divan et je viens juste de regarder les Simpson:)Je vais regarder The hours encore, j'adore tellement ce film !!!
no subject
Date: 2010-03-11 12:06 am (UTC)Hoooo! Je t'es pas dit! On vendait "A Streetcar named desire" pas cher dans ma ville, je l'ai acheté. J'ai juste pas eu le temps de l'écouter encore. :D (y'en restait juste une copie, contre 5 pour les autres films...faut croire qu'il y a des gens avec du goût ici! ^^).
no subject
Date: 2010-03-11 12:20 am (UTC)Haaaaaaaaaaaaaa c'est dont ben l'fun!!! Quel bon film... Écoute le dans le bus !!!
no subject
Date: 2010-03-11 12:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-03-11 01:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-03-11 01:26 am (UTC)L'ordi est une bonne marque, mais ses batteries valent rien.
no subject
Date: 2010-03-11 01:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-03-11 03:31 am (UTC)not gonna be able to think of strawberries without thinking of this story for quite some time. :D
...and now, I'll give those squirrels - and Jack & Ianto, too - some privacy.
no subject
Date: 2010-03-11 02:28 pm (UTC)Its was a really great fun to write this,but now strawberries take another sense for me... ;p
Thanks for them! You are a good reader :)