morgia: (Default)
[personal profile] morgia

Title: The show must go on
Pairing: Jack/Ianto , the team
Rating: NC-17
Spoilers
: Cyberwoman
Disclaimer: No, I don't know them
Warning: ansgt

Summary: Ianto return after his suspension ,
Notes:  Ok, soooo  Queen is a group that I adore, and when I listened this song, I thought about Ianto.   My so gorgeous beta approved this fic, so I have the courage to updated........ Hope you will enjoy! Thanks so much to read and comment ;) Like always, there is free hug at anyone who need some !!!
Beta: just_being_me08

master list






The show must go on

 

Empty spaces - what are we living for
Abandoned places - I guess we know the score
On and on, does anybody know what we are looking for...

 

The door opens with a cranky noise in an empty tourist office. The only light in the place are the rays of the sunshine outside. He closes the door, walks into the back room; the glow of the safety light is the only luminosity he has for guiding his steps. But, Ianto Jones doesn’t need light to walk in the darkness. He knows the way too well. It had been a week now since he returned from his suspension. He puts on the lights, takes off his coat, opens the mail, listens to the messages taped onto the voice mail, replies to some important e-mails, cleans up the garbage, arranges the maps and the leaflets for future tourists and sighs. A new day begins.

 

Another hero, another mindless crime
Behind the curtain, in the pantomime
Hold the line, does anybody want to take it anymore

 

 

He knows he has to join the others; they will certainly be waiting for their coffees. He closes his eyes, clenches his teeth, sighs profoundly and fixes his tie. With trembling fingers, he pushes the button to open the secret door. His eyes lock onto the frame, in front of him the scene plays out slowly, the same act like a nightmare that never ends.....

 

“If she’s still alive, you execute her.”

“No way.”

“You brought this down on us. You hid her. You hid yourself from us. Now it’s time for you to stand as part of the team.”

“Jack…..”

“The girl you loved has gone. Your loyalty is to us now.”

“You can’t order me to do that.”

“You execute her, or I’ll execute you both.”

 

She’s gone, he’s alive, but the emptiness he feels inside is worse than death. The pain never disappears; it’s just a constant presence that always walks at his side. But Ianto Jones is a strong man, he never shows emotion, he has to be brave. So he closes his heart, stands proudly and walks through the secret door. Another day begins and Ianto Jones is ready.

 

The show must go on
The show must go on, yeah
Inside my heart is breaking
My make-up may be flaking
But my smile still stays on

 

 

When he enters in the hub giggle drifts through the air. For a moment he hesitates, stopping. He knows it’s ridiculous, the world has not stopped just because he has fallen into the gloom, but this crystal noise is like an offense. Not far away from him, he watches Gwen and Owen play their ‘Ohhh look at me, I’m here and I want you but I don’t want anybody to have suspicions so I fake that I don’t have desire for you’ game. He knows he doesn’t have the right to be angry; all that happened was his fault. Life has to continue, maybe the shadows dance around him, but he has to carry on. With a smile he walks beside his teammates and to the kitchenette. The smell of coffee comforts him, some things are immutable and its better this way.

 

Whatever happens, I'll leave it all to chance
Another heartache, another failed romance
On and on, does anybody know what we are living for?

 

 

His fingers firmly grasp the tray; as he walks around the place giving out the coffees. He knows how to stave off his madness from the others, so he puts a smile on his face, keeps silent the screams inside his mind and carries on with his duties. He places a cup on Owen’s desk; the man doesn’t even take the time to look at him. Ianto Jones doesn’t care. He places another cup onto Gwen’s desk and she smiles with embarrassment. He smiles in return; the darkness disappearing for a moment. It’s only a smile, but he wants to believe in all the little attentions that could bring him back to the surface. He finally places a cup on Toshiko’s desk and she looks him directly in the eye. She puts her hand on his arm and squeezes softly. For a moment the pain flies away and he feels so alive. The happiness is fleeting. She’s turn around to her computer and the darkness rocks him again. But his smile still stays on, he knows he doesn’t have the right to, but he wants to believe that someone could save him. He raises his head and looks to Jack’s office; the last coffee, his last duty, his last broken dream.

 

I guess I'm learning (I'm learning learning learning)
I must be warmer now
I'll soon be turning (turning turning turning)
Round the corner now
Outside the dawn is breaking
But inside in the dark I'm aching to be free

 

 

He climbs the stairs to the office. He sighs, he has to be strong, and there is no place for his emotions. Ianto Jones has no right to dream, redemption never comes for a guilty man. So he closes his heart, stands proudly and walks through the office door.

 

 

The show must go on
The show must go on, yeah yeah
Ooh, inside my heart is breaking
My make-up may be flaking
But my smile still stays on


 

 

 

Silently, he enters the office and puts the coffee cup onto the desk. ‘Jack…… Can you save me?....’  Inside the pain is like a storm, the screams hurt his ears, but his face is like a porcelain doll.

“Magic coffee and Ianto Jones… what a wonderful way to begin the day!”

“It’s my pleasure sir.”

‘Jack… can you even see me?....’

 

He has to restrain himself to not fall on his knees in front of Jack and beg for the end, for the light, for a miracle. For a moment, his mind flies away; he imagines a life without pain, a place where the shadows are not waiting to devour his soul.

My soul is painted like the wings of butterflies
Fairytales of yesterday will grow but never die
I can fly - my friends
The show must go on (go on, go on, go on) yeah yeah
The show must go on (go on, go on, go on)
I'll face it with a grin
I'm never giving in
On - with the show

 

The other man looks at him and grins. Flirting is a part of the game between them; Ianto Jones knows he doesn’t have the right to beg for more. So he clenches his teeth, smiles and hopes for the game to finish soon.

 

Ooh, I'll top the bill, I'll overkill  
I have to find the will to carry on
On with the show
On with the show
The show - the show must go on

 

Fin

 

Date: 2009-03-15 12:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dragonsrmd.livejournal.com
I was emotional before, now I'm a wreck! Really well done. I'm a Queen fan too so I had the music playing in the background :)

Date: 2009-03-15 01:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Hoooo sorry for the wreck..... help if I give you cookies????

Wow, if a Queen fan enjoyed my fic, then I'm very very happy!!!!

Thank you so much ;)

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Date: 2009-03-15 01:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] emyrldlady.livejournal.com
Wow, could hear the song in my head as I read this, it blends so well.

Date: 2009-03-15 04:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Thanks you!!!!! Its was a hard one this fic, I'm soooo happy you think it blends well ;)

Date: 2009-03-15 01:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thrace-adams.livejournal.com
GAH all I could hear was the Moulin Rouge version...I had to buy the Queen version so I could hear it...I sense a video...no promises...but I sense a video...i could totally see this from Ianto's POV, the hurt the pain, the pride..so well done! Great story!

Date: 2009-03-15 02:27 am (UTC)
ext_47311: (Default)
From: [identity profile] frakkin-addict.livejournal.com
Oh yeah, I can totally picture a video to this song...

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Date: 2009-03-15 04:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Thank you Thrace !!! Wow, soo proud if my fic inspired you a vid !!!! *hug*

Date: 2009-03-15 02:28 am (UTC)
ext_47311: (Default)
From: [identity profile] frakkin-addict.livejournal.com
WOWWOWOWOWOWOW!!! That was amazing. I think paralleling Ianto's story to that Queen song made this fic so powerful emotionally. Brilliant! Loved it!

*Hugs!*

Date: 2009-03-15 04:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Haaaaaa thanks !!! *blush* This song is soooo powerful, and I thought it was just perfect for Ianto..... So happy you enjoyed it, that's mean I worked well ;)

Take care
xxxxxxx

Date: 2009-03-15 04:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] psykaos42.livejournal.com
Beautifully done. The juxtaposition of the images and the song lyrics worked really well. I love Queen anyway, but I've always like that song in particular, and I can see Ianto doing this; pushing all the pain down and just going on, no matter how bad it hurts.

Date: 2009-03-15 04:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Exactly, it is how I see Ianto in the first season: pushing all the pain down and just going on, no matter how bad it hurts.

This song it's one of my favorite, it's powerfu;, sad, emotional and its a great poésie. I tried my best and I'm very proud you liked.

Take care, always great to read yours comments.

Date: 2009-03-15 10:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] missthingsplace.livejournal.com
That was amazing!

Date: 2009-03-15 01:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Haaaa!!! Thanks Miss ;)

Take care

Date: 2009-03-15 10:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wykling.livejournal.com
Oh wow... *gobsmacked*
This was so emotional, the lyrics and your fic match so well :D
I have to admit, I was thinking of the Moulin Rouge-version as well hmm... I think I should give the Queen-version a try.
Gaah poor Ianto *huggles* now I must write some fluff for him
Big hugs and take care!
xxxxx

Date: 2009-03-15 01:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Haaa thanks sweetie!!!! *blush* I'm soooo happy you liked it, I thought about this fic a long time before have the courage to writing it.

Yep, the Moulin Rouge version is great, but I continue to believe that Queen's version is better for this fic and for Ianto. Really, you have to listen Queen, the emotion in this song......

I'm agree, ater that, you should write fluffy thing for our Ianto.... ;)

Big hug et gros calins
xxxxxxxxxxx

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Date: 2009-03-15 10:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lexia4.livejournal.com
You rarely see this side of Ianto after his suspension so I liked it very much!! :)

Date: 2009-03-15 01:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Thanks !! Indeed, this side is rarely shows. I think is a sad and dark side of Ianto that is really interesting....

Date: 2009-03-15 12:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] alicatt13.livejournal.com
I'm usually a fan of song related fic but this was very poignant. There are are a number of songs that make me think of Jack and/or Ianto but I hadn't even considered this one. It's really pretty perfect. I prefer the queen version myself. Freddie's voice is so haunting. Great job!

Date: 2009-03-15 01:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
I love this song. I think the Queen version is better for Ianto. I loved the Moulin Rouge version, but, Freddie was unique, his voice was amazing and its better for Ianto.

Thank you so much for read and comment, that is really, really appreciated ;)

Date: 2009-03-15 02:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] christine-twfan.livejournal.com
That was simply wonderful, sweetie. You captured his pain and determination perfectly. Bravo!

Date: 2009-03-15 06:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Hello Christine! Its great to see you around. Thanks, I'm very happy you enjoyed my fic. *hug* Do you going to give us a new fic soon? We miss you sooooo much (well, I don't know for the other, but I miss you ;))
Take care

Date: 2009-03-15 07:25 pm (UTC)
ext_41796: (Default)
From: [identity profile] elanor12.livejournal.com
This was marvelous ma belle. So emotional, very well done :) I love this song so much, and you fic fit perfectly with it. Bravo!
I adore Queen
This song always make me sad, and then I watched Moulin Rouge *cries* and god, what a brilliant film.
And then I watched a tv show where they explained how and when Freddy Mercury wrote this song. *cries more*

Toi, mon amie, tu as le don d'avoir un thème qui me rend émotionelle :)
Take care
xx

Date: 2009-03-15 07:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
naaaaaa come here in my arms for a big hug *squeeze you firmly* Je suis vraiment contente de pouvoir faire vibrer une corde sensible en toi, quel beau compliment pour un auteur *squeeze you again*

This song is soooooo fabulous and sad, but, but get my curiosity sweetie, how and when Freddy wrote this song? Its about when he knew he had aids?

So happy to read yours comments at each time ma chérie, hope yours studies goes well

Take care
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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Date: 2009-03-16 02:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] foreverjack.livejournal.com
Amazing! the lyrics and your words made a perfect combination, Nadine!! It was very emotional and powerful!!
Btw, I entered the music world with Queen and a marvellous concert they gave in Buenos Aires in 1981; I watched on TV but enjoyed it a lot!!

Date: 2009-03-16 03:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Naaaaaaa thanks!!!! I was so nervous about the combination, so your comment are like a wramth blanked for my writer's soul!!! ;) *big hug*

Whaaaaaaa, that should been soooo amazing to watch! I remember the first time I heard Queen... I have to old brothers, and the song "we will rock you" was like a illumination for me .....

Haaaa, take care ma chérie and I hope you will have great time with yours students
Big hug et gros calins

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Date: 2009-03-16 04:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wynkat1313.livejournal.com
This is awesome. I love the song first of all (and in fact have been listening to it alot of late) And this is just beautifully done. So poignant and powerful. I didnt want it to end, but it's ending was perfect if that makes sense.

Date: 2009-03-16 09:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
First : I love your icon

Second: Thanks!!!!!! I was worried about how to write this fic, but I believed that's song fit so well with Ianto. So I'm very happy you enjoyed it ;)

Date: 2009-03-16 06:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] parmanya.livejournal.com
Morgia - this is my favourite of your stories to date!
Your finesse with English subtlety grows with each new vignette and scene - and I could see this one so *clearly*, the visuals and the way you brought your readers inside of Ianto's emotional state, to feel right along with him.

Thank you for posting this.

Date: 2009-03-16 09:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
haaaaa after a long monday at work your comment make me smile, thank you very much. What you said mean a lot to me, English its not my first language, to play with the words is a pleasure for me, to write this was a great but hard challenge. Yours words warmht me inside ;)

Thank you so much for read and comment. Comment like yours help to continu in this way *hug*

Date: 2009-03-16 08:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] minimumstitch.livejournal.com
Beautifully written. I could feel the despair and the brief glimpses of hope coming through.

Date: 2009-03-16 09:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Naaaa thanks !!!!! *big hug*

Date: 2009-03-16 09:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hab318princess.livejournal.com
oh, heartbreaking, beautifullyy written!

Date: 2009-03-16 09:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Haaaa!!!! Thanks!!!! Great to see you back!!! How was your week-end??

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Date: 2009-03-17 07:25 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] candy-belle.livejournal.com
OMG!!! Dalin' I LOVE this fic!!!! It's so sad and so beautiful you totally capture the pain not to mention the fact I adore this song xxx gorgeous fic xxx *big big hug* xxxx

Date: 2009-03-17 02:33 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Haaaaaa Bella Thanks!!!!!! Wow, so happy that you enjoyed my fic!! I looooove this song, looove Queen. *big hug* Really Bella, its mean a lot to me that you read and comment *big hug*

Date: 2009-03-17 10:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] k-bug-who1.livejournal.com
Thank you so much! That was such a wonderful read, I truly loved it. You've perfectly suited the song, too (which is one of my favourite songs)
Fantastic work!
Kar, xx

Date: 2009-03-17 11:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morgia.livejournal.com
Thanks!!!!!!! I'm so happy you enoyed this! This song is so emotional, so sad and is was a great challenge to me.

Really, thanks for reand comment.

xx

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